Friday funny: First Wedding Dance

Hat tip: Co-worker K

A new "normal"

First of all, comments and snide remarks regarding the shafting of my blog-life may proceed to the nearest southside of a northbound mule and pucker up. The counter to the right says 18 days til graduation, so I'm knee deep in trying to decide what major to change to now...

Just kidding. Anyway...

G-day impending and all, I've grown quite contemplative as of late. No more sitting in class learning cool new stuff; instead, I'll be sitting at a desk/workbench working on the cool new stuff. While this is a welcome (and long anticipated) change, it is, nonetheless just that. Change.

Don't get me wrong, I'm looking forward to it. It's just that once you've been institutionalized for the better part of your 20s, you almost take a bit of comfort in being in a school setting, just because it's normal. To looks of disbelief I've been uttering the words "graduate school" and "masters" when people ask about me finally finishing. I honestly find myself not in such a hurry to get home when finishing up the school day, lingering back to chat up a professor, talk to fellow seniors, maybe even offer a tidbit of advice or two to some lower classmen...

Oh, who am I kidding? My last day of class is next Thursday, with one or two finals the week after that. "Move it!" is about the only salutation a chatty prof will get outta me as I burn shoe-rubber to my truck. If another senior even so much as asks how my digital III project is going, then proceeds to tell me that they had their's done the week before classes even started, I will personally make them the first living souls to receive an electronic enema.

And here's a tidbit for the lower classmen - if you see smoke, turn the power off, and for all our sake, replace the component that burned up. They tend not to work well once you've let the magic smoke escape.

There, back to "normal."

Gun-free zones

Hat-tip: Xavier

Money? Have some buckshot!

This is just too golden for me to pass up - a guy tries to mug a lady, and then...

A suspected purse snatcher didn't know what he was in for when he picked a woman in a Home Depot parking lot for a victim. As soon as he grabbed her purse, the woman's husband grabbed a shotgun and opened fire.

"I had a board in my hand right here and I thought he was going to beg for money...is what I thought," said Norman. "He grabbed her and I already had that door open so I just grabbed my shotgun."

"The sound of the shotgun and that dude burning off -- it was funny," said eyewitness Freddy Butler.

Butler chased after the accused purse snatcher. who took off running and ended up asking a police officer for help.

"He displays a weapon and it scares the suspect," said a deputy on the scene. "The suspect runs up the police car and saying, 'Let me in. They are shooting at me'."

Police took the suspect into custody.

Hehehe...

Diary of Pregnant Woman

First of all, if you have no idea what the subject line refers to, go here. Now, then...

The following is truth, from a certain point of view:

2:11 am - wakes up to pee
2:19 am - washes hands and comes back to bed
2:20 am - realizes she's hungry
2:25 am - realizes she's really hungry and the alarm isn't going off for another 4 hours
2:26 am - ambles downstairs for a peanut butter sammich; consumes in two bites
2:28 am - back to sleep
3:57 am - peeing again
4:11 am - wakes up; still peeing
4:14 am - back to sleep
5:45 am - our zoo begins to stir, needing to be fed
5:46 am - wife begins to stir, needing to be fed
5:50 am - animals still hungry, wife has another PB sammich
6:20 am - animals, wife, are fed and happy
7:00 am - with pantyhose half on, ambles back downstairs for a bowl of cereal
8:20 am - arrives at work, 3rd breakfast
10:00 am - midmorning snack
11:15 am - brunch
12:30 pm - lunch
1:45 pm - afternoon tea, or afternoon popcorn
3:00 pm - afternoon chocolate
5:30 pm - leaves work; picks up bucket of KFC for dinner
6:00 pm - arrives home; deposits empty KFC bucket in trash
6:30 pm - supper, prepared by THE GREATEST HUSBAND IN THE WORLD
7:15 pm - snack or second helping
8:30 pm - asleep on couch
9:15 pm - asleep in bed